"We're done" Alice said as we walked out the door. For the rest of my 6th grade year we didn't talk. We hated Ellen and Ellen hated us.
Grudges become a baggage that you carry with you for a long time. My hatred became a burden and it was eating me alive. I hated her even more. It's interesting how humans rather hold onto hatred then to forgive...
It took time but I finally realized that I needed to change. Ellen probably had forgotten about it but I held onto the feelings as if it had happened yesterday. I couldn't do it anymore.
"Ellen, I know we haven't spoken since 6th grade but I wanted to tell you that I am sorry. I'm sorry for the harsh words, rolled eyes, back talk and everything else. I just wanted to clear this up so I can move on. Good luck in high school."
She never apologized or said a word. I guess she didn't feel the need to apologize and I really didn't care anymore. I felt free from this dark shadow over me. It was over.
Grudges drag you down into a pit of hate. For as long as you hate somebody you won't be able to love. I guess we are so stubborn that we don't like to admit we are wrong. Guess what? We all make mistakes so it really is not our right to hate anybody for their faults.
Many times we'll have to ask ourselves this question "Forgive or not forgive?" Just know one thing...those that forgive are forgiven as well.
God Bless,
Bi
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